Bell Curve Blues

Almost everything is really good at something. Through a combination of natural ability and practice some people become very proficient at certain activities or tasks. A few people are just flat-out gifted at attributes like intelligence or creativity. I've found that such individuals sometimes are not very graceful when dealing with the limitations of others. In such situations I try to introduce to them a concept that I call the "Bell Curve Blues".

In case you don't remember, a bell curve is simply a measure of how probability is distributed. For any attribute most people are clumped in the middle of the bell, while progressively fewer and fewer are further away from the norm. It's not just that most people are of average intelligence. Most people are of average everything: that's what average means.

If you are at the 85th percentile of a skill or ability, by definition that means that out of 100 people only 14 will be at or above your level. 95th percentile? Only 4 people can keep up with you. If you are easily frustrated by others' limitations in your area of expertise, that means the more skilled you become the more intolerant you will be.

The solution to this dilemma is two-fold. One possibility, of course, is to find more people of similar ability. But since you have to live in the real bell curve of the world, you will benefit greatly by developing your sense of patience, understanding and compassion for those who don't share your abilities. This gets close to the concepts of emotional and social intelligence, which are ways to describe your ability to manage your relationship with others. We've probably all known people who were way above average in cognitive intelligence but below the norm for emotional and social development.

Will Rogers once quipped "everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects." No matter how proficient you may be at certain skills, there are inevitably other areas where you are closer to the caboose than the engine. When you practice patience, tolerance and compassion you will find that these differences amount to much less importance than they first seem. The bottom line is to match your efforts to be the best you can be with your ability to accept others as they are.

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