Therapeutic Metaphor: Titanic

Here's another in my on-going series of therapeutic metaphors that I occasionally use in my counseling practice.

I often come across situations in which a person demonstrates many fine and admirable attributes while also possessing one tragic flaw that outweighs all of his or her positive qualities. For instance, a woman may be enthralled by a man who is a hard worker, funny, exciting and romantic, but if he occasionally gets drunk and violent this negative feature can quickly negate all of those positive qualities. In pointing this out I might remark that the Titanic was an absolutely wonderful ship except for one problem....the hole under the surface that sunk it.

We all have character flaws, and it's generally best when they are visible to ourselves and others so that they can be recognized and dealt with openly. But certain issues are so hard for some people to face that they are kept hidden "below the waterline" where they go unnoticed until the damage that has been done is too great to repair. It's tragic when a good ship begins taking on water, but it's foolish to pretend not to notice that it's happening.

The other "Titanic" metaphor I like refers to "upgrading to a better room on the Titanic" or "rearranging furniture on the Titanic", both of which are variations on the concept of making a superficial change or improvement without recognizing the larger, more important and more dire circumstance. Sometimes it's hard to grasp the degree of change we must make to stay afloat, which is where good feedback from someone we trust can be a lifesaver.
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